I'm Invisible

Thanks to Momma C. for sharing this with me. I hope you find encouragement and blessing in this poignant reminder of our position as Mothers. I dedicate this especially to those of you still "in the trenches"!
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I'm invisible.

It all began to make sense, the blank stares, the lack of response, the way one of the kids will walk into the room while I'm on the phone and ask to be taken to the store. Inside I'm thinking, "Can't you see I'm on the phone?" Obviously not. No one can see if I'm on the phone, or cooking, or sweeping the floor, or even standing on my head in the corner, because no one can see me at all. I'm invisible.

Some days I am only a pair of hands, nothing more: Can you fix this? Can you tie this? Can you open this? Some days I'm not a pair of hands; I'm not even a human being. I'm a clock to ask, "What time is it?" I'm a satellite guide to answer, "What number is the Disney Channel?" I'm a car to order,"Right around 5:30 , please."

I was certain that these were the hands that once held books and the eyes that studied history and the mind that graduated summa cum laude - but now they had disappeared into the peanut butter, never to be seen again. She's going... she's going... she's gone!

One night, a group of us were having dinner, celebrating the return of a friend from England. Janice had just gotten back from a fabulous trip, and she was going on and on about the hotel she stayed in. I was sitting there, looking around at the others all put together so well. It was hard not to compare and feel sorry for myself as I looked down at my out-of-style dress; it was the only thing I could find that was clean. My unwashed hair was pulled up in a banana clip and I was afraid I could actually smell peanut butter in it.

I was feeling pretty pathetic, when Janice turned to me with a beautifully wrapped package, and said, "I brought you this." It was a book on the great cathedrals of Europe . I wasn't exactly sure why she'd given it to me untilI read her inscription: "To Charlotte , with admiration for the greatness of what you are building when no one sees."

In the days ahead I would read - no, devour - the book. And I would discover what would become for me, four life-changing truths, after which I could pattern my work:
1. No one can say who built the great cathedrals - we have no record of their names.
2. These builders gave their whole lives for a work they would never see finished.
3. They made great sacrifices and expected no credit.
4. The passion of their building was fueled by their faith that the eyes of God saw everything. A legendary story in the book told of a rich man who came to visit the cathedral while it was being built, and he saw a workman carving a tiny bird on the inside of a beam. He was puzzled and asked the man, "Why are you spending so much time carving that bird into a beam that will be covered by the roof? No one will ever see it. "And the workman replied, "Because God sees." I closed the book, feeling the missing piece fall into place. It was almost as if I heard God whispering to me, "I see you, Charlotte. I see the sacrifices you make every day, even when no one around you does. No act of kindness you've done, no sequin you've sewn on, no cupcake you've baked, is too small for me to notice and smile over. You are building a great cathedral, but you can't see right now what it will become."

At times, my invisibility feels like an affliction. But it is not a disease that is erasing my life. It is the cure for the disease of my ownself-centeredness. It is the antidote to my strong, stubborn pride. I keep the right perspective when I see myself as a great builder. As one of the people who show up at a job that they will never see finished, to work on something that their name will never be on. The writer of the book went so far as to say that no cathedrals could ever be built in our lifetime because there are so few people willing to sacrifice to that degree. When I really think about it, I don't want my son to tell the friend he's bringing home from college for Thanksgiving, "My mom gets up at 4 in the morning and bakes homemade pies, and then she hand bastes a turkey for three hours and presses all the linens for the table." That would mean I'd built a shrine or a monument to myself. I just want him to want to come home. And then, if there is anything more to say to his friend, to add, "You're gonna love it there."

As mothers, we are building great cathedrals. We cannot be seen if we're doing it right. And one day, it is very possible that the world will marvel, not only at what we have built, but at the beauty that has been added to the world by the sacrifices of invisible women.

Live Simply.
Love Generously.
Care Deeply.
Speak Kindly.
Leave the rest to God
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And to add one of my favorite verses:
"Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up." Galatians 6:9

Reflections Of A Mother

Reflections Of A Mother

I gave you life, but cannot live it for you.
I can teach you things, but I cannot make you learn.
I can give you directions, but I cannot be there to lead you.
I can allow you freedom, but I cannot account for it.
I can take you to church, but I cannot make you believe.
I can teach you right from wrong, but I cannot always decide for you.
I can buy you beautiful clothes, but I cannot make you beautiful inside.
I can offer you advice, but I cannot accept it for you.
I can give you love, but I cannot force it upon you.
I can teach you to share, but I cannot make you unselfish.
I can teach you respect, but I cannot force you to show honor.
I can advise you about friends, but cannot choose them for you.
I can advise you about sex, but I cannot keep you pure.
I can tell you the facts of life, but I can't build your reputation.
I can tell you about drink, but I can't say "no" for you.
I can warn you about drugs, but I can't prevent you from using them.
I can tell you about lofty goals, but I can't achieve them for you.
I can teach you about kindness, but I can't force you to be gracious.
I can warn you about sins, but I cannot make you moral.
I can love you as a child, but I cannot place you in God's family.
I can pray for you, but I cannot make you walk with God.
I can tell you how to live, but I cannot give you eternal life.

This poem struck a cord with me when I first read it several months ago. The author understands the difficult position of the parent who desires to instill godly character into their children while at the same time understanding that ultimately, the result lies in the hands of their offspring. Each child will, Lord willing, grow into adulthood and decide for themselves what their character will be, who they will follow and what choices they will make. What seems so cut and dry when our babies are small, at times becomes an overwhelming realization that we don't have as much control as we once thought we did. There are times when life seems to hang in the balance as we pray and wait to see if our young adults will stay the course and choose to honor Christ.

I'm sure it is the prayer of each Mother and Father who desire to honor God, that our children will choose the right path in a fallen world and keep to the "straight and narrow". What joy and sorrows we can encounter as we help our children navigate the shifting sands of this world. God give us the wisdom and strength to consistently point our children to you, the only rock.

"Let us hold fast the confession of our hope without wavering for He who promised is faithful; and let us consider how to stimulate one another to love and good deeds..." Heb 10:23-24

"I have no greater joy than this, to hear of my children walking in the truth." 3 John 1:4

Source: I'm sorry I don't know the author of the poem, Reflections Of A Mother. It can be located at: http://www.storybin.com/wisdom/wisdom141.shtml

Recipes & Celebrations

Mother & Daughters...

My Mother's Day Celebration was spread out over a few weeks this year... lucky me!

Sadly, Ashley lives half way across the country so we did not get to see her and SIL in person...however she and Casey are sweet to phone often and they sent a beautiful card and monetary gift for me to purchase"something special". So, on behalf of Ashley and Casey...we are now the proud owners of a new, electric Cuisinart Frozen Yogurt/Sorbet/Ice Cream Maker. I have been having fun experimenting with different recipes and will post some in the future!! I'm sure this won't really help in the fight I'm having with my "marturing Middle Age spread". But, Oh Well! We are really looking forward to their visit in a few weeks. I'll have to try out some of the new recipes while they are here in town!!

Megan, Brad and I celebrated Mother's Day a week early due to the fact that we would be moving her out of town on June 13th. She treated us to a wonderful evening out at a chic, upscale Italian restaurant. We had great service and even better food! It was fun to sit out on the Patio, enjoy the evening air and spend time together visiting. I felt very spoiled! I have been lamenting the fact that I didn't have my camera with me to capture a few pictures. I will miss our weekly lunch dates now that she is out of town. Thanks Megan, it was a lovely evening!

Since we helped Megan move on Mother's Day, Erin and Micah were kind enough to reschedule a special meal Erin had been planning for Mother's Day. Last Friday evening we went to their home for lovely meal Erin had worked hard to prepare. Fine china and flowers graced the table along with salad, rolls, potatoes, steak, special sauce, sparkling punch and cheesecake. Thanks Erin for all your hard work and for making me feel very special. The meal and entire evening was wonderful!!
Of course... to the man that made this whole "motherhood" thing possible in the first place... Thanks Bradley, I love you! He went over the top this year and purchased the laptop computer we have been wanting to get. Now I am mobile!! I've already taken it out on it's maiden voyage to Panera Bread... a great back-up for the frequent time we loose Internet service at home! Thanks Honey!!

Erin shared her recipes with me and said I could pass them on to you! :-) Thanks Sweetie!

Tangy Lemon Cheesecake
2-1/2 c. crushed gingersnaps (about 40 cookies)
1/3 c. butter, melted

Filling:
3 packages (8oz each) cream cheese, softened
1 c. sugar
3 eggs
1 T. lemon juice
1 T vanilla extract

Sauce:
½ c. sugar
2 T. cornstarch
¾ c. water
2 T. butter
¼ c. lemon juice
1 T. grated lemon peel

In a small bowl, combine cookie crumbs and butter; mix well. Press onto the bottom and 2 in. up the sides of a greased 9-in. spring-form pan; set aside. In a mixing bowl, beat cream cheese and sugar until smooth. Add eggs; beat on low just until combined. Add lemon juice and vanilla; beat just until blended. Pour into crust. Bake at 350* for 35-40 minutes or until center is almost set. Cool on a wire rack for 10 minutes. Carefully run a knife around the edge of pan to loosen; cool 1 hour longer. In a sauce-pan, combine sugar and cornstarch. Stir in water until smooth; bring to a boil. Reduce heat; cook and stir over medium heat for 2 minutes or until thickened. Remove from the heat; stir in butter, lemon juice and peel. Refrigerate cheesecake and sauce overnight. Serve sauce over cheesecake. Garnish with mint leaves and fresh berries. Yield: 12 servings.
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Filet Mignon
For 2: Heat olive oil in a pan. Saute one clove garlic (minced), green onion, rosemary, pepper and salt. Add filets. Cook 5-9 minutes on each side over medium heat, or until reaches desired doneness. Remove filet mignons to serving platter. Add 1/4 c. dry white wine to skillet, scraping up garlic and other seasonings in bottom of pan. Drizzle over filet mignons.
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Boursin Cheese
(“Mean Chef” on RecipeZaar.com)
Makes 2 cups:

2 cloves garlic
8 oz. butter, softened
2 (8oz) pkgs cream cheese, softened
½ t. salt
½ t. chopped fresh basil
½ t. marjoram, fresh or dried
½ t. chopped green onions
¼ t. thyme, fresh or dried
½ t. fresh ground black pepper
1 t. dill weed

Add all ingredients to a blender or food processor and process until smooth and well-combined.
Spoon mixture into a small serving bowl and chill overnight.
Serve at room temperature.
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Potato Gratin with Boursin

2 c. heavy cream
5 oz. boursin cheese (about 1/4 of recipe above)
3 lbs red potatoes, peeled [I didn't peel], thinly sliced
Salt and pepper

1. Preheat oven to 400 degrees.
2. Grease 9x13 baking dish
3. Stir cream and boursin in heavy saucepan over medium heat until cheese melts and mixture is smooth.
4. Arrange 1/2 of potatoes in baking dish, season with salt and pepper and pour 1/2 of cream mixture over.
5. Repeat
6. Bake until top is golden and potatoes are tender, about 1 hour.

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Mock Champagne Punch

1 qt. white grape juice, chilled
1 qt. ginger ale, chilled
Strawberries or raspberries

Combine grape juice and ginger ale; pour into a punch bowl or glasses. Garnish with berries. Yield: 16 (1/2 c.) servings

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Outback Ranch Dressing

1 t. dry ranch dressing mix
1 c. mayo
1/2 c. buttermilk
1/4 t. black pepper
1 med-lg clove garlic, minced
Dash red pepper, or more if you like spicy!

Mix well or blend in blender. Chill for at least 30 minutes before serving.

Mother's Day - My Three "Moms"

Mother’s Day… My Three "Moms"

This year I have a special keenness to my thoughts on our upcoming celebration of Mother’s Day. I have been blessed. Blessed with three women in my life whom I call “Mom”. Allow me to introduce them.

My Mother – To others she was known as “Dee”, but to me she was always “Mom”. She was the first woman in my life…married to the first Man in my life. She gave me birth and taught me about life. She poured herself into raising my brother, sister and I. She loved us and we knew it. She loved my Dad and their special bond was evident to all. She also loved Jesus, and it showed. I still remember her sincere rejoicing when I, as an 8 year old girl, ran to her after accepting Christ on that hot August day during church camp. She gave me a firm foundation, a loving home, a wonderful example of a godly woman I could emulate. She planted the inspiration in me to be a “worker at home” and to make my future family my focus. She quietly showed selflessness by example. From her I learned the joy of life…and the sorrow of loss through death. I was 14 years old when the Lord called my Mother home. She was young, and I wasn’t ready to let go of her yet. Even so, through her battle with cancer, I watched her live out Psalms 31:14 “But as for me, I trust in Thee, O Lord. I say, ‘Thou art my God.’ My times are in Thy hand.” And 2 Timothy 4:7 “I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith.” And now, 35 years later, I am still honored to “rise up, and bless her”. I love you Mom.
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My Mom – To others she is known as Linda, but to me she is now “Mom”. She married my Dad in 1972 and doubled the size of her family with the words “I do”! I respect her for accepting the challenge of raising six children with ages ranging from 2 – 16 years. Not an easy task for a widowed 32 year old to take on! As many of you may know, a blended family has a special set of challenges to overcome on the road to “family unity”. Our challenges were great, at times our tears were many as we learned to “grow up” and grow together in Christ. The Lord had a special purpose in bringing us all together! We have learned “…that God causes all things to work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to His purpose.” (Rom 8:28) We continue to drink deeply of God’s faithfulness in our lives! There are so many things I praise God for in Mom’s life. Her spiritual growth and love for the Lord is evident to all. She speaks often of her love of God and thankfulness for His faithfulness and grace in her life. She is an encouragement to those around her. Her enthusiastic trust in Him is catching! I love to hear her laugh!! She is a mentor and friend to many women and I, like them, respect her. She loves my Dad. I am often challenged in my own life when I watch the way she cares for and serves my Dad. She enjoys her family and lets us know it! And now, 35 years after meeting her, I want to use this opportunity to “rise up, and bless her”. I love you Mom.

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My “Mother-In-Love” – To others she is know as Arlene, but to me she is “Mom”. She is the mother of my husband. She did a fine job of raising her son to be a man of godly character. Several years ago I crossed stitched this poem and gave it to her:

To “His” Mother
Mother-in-law they say, and yet,
Somehow I simply can’t forget
‘Twas you who watched his baby ways
Who taught him his first hymn of praise;
Who smiled on him with living pride
When he first toddled by your side.
Mother-in-law but oh, “twas you,
Who taught him to be kind and true.
When he was tired, almost asleep,
‘Twas to your arms he used to creep.
And when he bruised his tiny knee,
‘Twas you who kissed it tenderly.
Mother-in-law they say, and yet,
Somehow I never shall forget.
How very much I owe
To you, who taught him how to grow.
You trained your son to look above,
You made of him the man I love.
And so I think of that today,
Ah! Then with thankful heart I’ll say,
“Our Mother”

I am thankful for the godly example I see in my Mother-in-love. She has a quiet strength of character that comes from years of walking with the Lord. He has seen fit to use her mightily in the ministry of Christian Women’s Club. Not only is she involved at the local club level, but as a key note speaker who shares her testimony across the country. She has a servant’s heart and uses it to serve her family well. Although she may not realize it, she is such an inspiration to me in my job of homemaking. Her home is a study in organizational skills. Since I am a “recovering pack rat”, I am constantly inspired by her peaceful and orderly home. She works hard at preparing fresh and healthy meals. Practicing good stewardship for the health of her family is a priority for her. I am honored to call her “Mom”. And now, 31 years after meeting her, I want to use this opportunity to “rise up, and bless her”. I love you Mom.

Credits: "Mother's Prayer" poem by: Peggy Wellman
Photos: Personal collection

Inspirational Quotes for Mother's Day

'The most important thing a father can do for his children is to love their mother.' Author Unknown

"I remember my mother's prayers and they have always followed me. They have clung to me all my life." Abraham Lincoln

"If you bungle raising your children, I don't think whatever else you do well matters very much." Jacqueline Kennedy Onassis

"We never know the love of the parent until we become parents ourselves." Henry Ward Beecher

"The heart of a mother is a deep abyss at the bottom of which you will always find forgiveness." Honore de Balzac, author

"The mother's heart is the child's schoolroom." Henry Ward Beecher, US Congressional clergyman

"All mothers are working mothers." Author Unknown

"It kills you to see them grow up. But I guess it would kill you quicker if they didn't." Barbara Kingsolver

"Being a full-time mother is one of the highest salaried jobs... since the payment is pure love." Mildred B. Vermont

"Nobody knows of the work it makes to keep the home together. Nobody knows of the steps it takes, Nobody knows-but Mother." Anonymous

"When you are a mother, you are never really alone in your thoughts. A mother always has to think twice, once for herself and once for her child." Sophia Loren, Women and Beauty

"No gift to your mother can ever equal her gift to you - life." Anonymous quotes

And remember.... "Insanity is hereditary; you get it from your children!" Sam Levenson

Before I was a Mom...

Before I was a Mom…

Before I was a Mom…
I set my own schedule.
I could sleep in or stay up as late as I wanted.
I had a wardrobe full of unstained clothing.
I enjoyed uninterrupted conversations with my husband and on the phone.

Before I was a Mom…
I cleaned my house each day.
I never tripped over toys or found my car keys in the toy box.
I had complete control of my mind and my thoughts.
I remembered things.

Before I was a Mom…
I didn't worry whether or not my plants were poisonous.
I never thought about immunizations.
I never held down a screaming child so the doctors could do tests, give a shot, or sew stitches.
I had never been puked on, pooped on, spit on, chewed on, and peed on.

Before I was a Mom…
I never looked into the face of a child with teary eyes and cried.
I never got gloriously happy over a simple grin or a few steps taken.
I didn't know how special it could feel to feed a hungry baby.
I never held a sleeping baby just because I wanted to watch her sleep.
I had never gotten up in the middle of the night... every 10 minutes, to make sure all was OK.

Before I was a Mom…
I never felt my heart break into a million pieces when I couldn't stop the hurt.
I never knew that something so small could affect my life so much.
I never knew that I could love someone so much.
I didn't know the feeling of having my heart outside my body.

Before I was a Mom…
I didn't know the strong bond between a Mother and her child.
I didn't know the challenges of each stage of parenting.
I didn't know the pain of feeling rejected by my child and trying to survive their "teen years".
I didn't know how much it could hurt to watch them learn a lesson "the hard way."

Before I was a Mom...
I had never known the warmth, the joy, the love, the heartache, the wonder or the satisfaction of being a Mom.
I never knew I would love being a Mom.
I didn't know I was capable of feeling so much......
......before I was a Mom.