It's worse than I thought

As you know, a few days back I came out of the closet and bared my soul to the world (at least my corner of the www). Yes, I admitted my addiction to collecting recipes. Oh sure, for years I've told myself that my fixation with gaining new recipes was "just a hobby". But it has become clear to me that I am in denial and my "hobby" is actually an addiction. There, I've said it! I know this is a sensitive subject for many of you, and I would use parental caution in letting young ones read this post. But I thought if I could help one poor soul by sharing my story, it would be worth it.

It all began innocently enough as a new bride who wanted to please her husband. I enjoyed going into the kitchen and producing the evening meal or tinkering around from time to time, making a batch of cookies, a decadent dessert or a loaf of bread with great results. I would set aside those recipes to repeat again and again. It made me feel good to produce that feeling of contentment for those that partook of my culinary productions. After all, many ladies that I loved and respected had their own collection of recipes, and seemed able to control their use of these resources in a positive and healthy way. I didn't feel that I was in any danger of loosing control over this growing interest. I would gladly accept recipes slipped to me by friends at a party. But soon, that wasn't enough and I began buying my own. I would purchase entire books at a time. I would get a particular high if I could add to my collection through a sweet deal at a local yard sale or discount store. I maintained these methods of acquisition for several years. No one ever confronted me...in fact, my friends and family kept me supplied with additional recipes-usually each time I would ask for more. As my addiction progressed I turned to the Internet. Yes, I am ashamed to say, I began downloading. It was just too easy. I could surf the Internet in the privacy of my own home, and everywhere I looked I found recipes. We would receive several emails a week advertising the latest and greatest recipes that could be had...just a click away. I gave in. I began frequenting the sites and printing off recipes to try whenever I needed a fix. Sometimes on a daily basis. Sometimes more than once a day. Hardly a week goes by that I am not in my kitchen trying out a new recipe from my expansive stash. This behavior has gone on for years.

But...this week I have finally come out of denial and faced my addiction. I've come to grips with the fact that things have gotten out of control and I have to make some hard choices. You all have been so very kind and good to me and I have felt empowered to take action. So, last Monday morning I put myself into rehab. Sometimes you just have to tough it out and do what it takes.

Detox Central. I spent hours this week sitting on the couch & sorting through recipes-

discarded stash thrown by the wayside.

It has been a difficult week, but I have faced the brutal truth and have been weeding much of the offending evidence from my life. I was very pleased with my progress and planned to finish up

the last of my detox program on Friday.

Box of "de-cluttered" kitchen items ready for Goodwill.

I have dealt with each pile and file of "must try" recipes resulting in my final collection of family favorites and a manageable selection of those awaiting judgement. Yesterday morning I awoke refreshed and excited, knowing it would be my final day in detox. I could taste success and I had confidence that I have faced my battle head on and would emerge stronger person.

Well....that was BEFORE breakfast. Then it happened. I was sitting at our kitchen counter ingesting my morning nourishment for the final task before me, my mind began to go over each area of my kitchen where I had been stashing my "collection". I had culled over the two cabinets and was content with what I have remaining on the shelves.

Acceptable...

I also looked at the two areas where I have a few recipe books out for display and easy access. Ok, this all was acceptable to me. Everything I owned was either organized in our family recipe notebooks, or in these few areas in my kitchen.

And then...I began wondering what I had done with my collection of magazines that touted the latest and greatest recipes promising to bring love and fame. I reached down under the kitchen counter overhang and opened up the storage cupboard, and this is what I saw:

Two additional shelves of neatly organized magazines and recipes....all waiting for my attention. My forgotten stash. And no, these are not just any set of magazines that contain recipes...sitting there is my collection of Country Woman Magazine dating back to 1993 and up through 2006. Come on ladies...I still have the first "Collectors Edition"!!


I subscribed to this magazine back in 1993 when living in the country was just a dream. I would sit in our city home with our postage stamp sized yard and vicariously soak in beautiful surroundings through the photos sent in by other readers who made their homes in the country. Just because we looked out our kitchen window and saw the brick wall of our neighbor's home 6 feet away, didn't mean I didn't know how to appreciate the scenic views from the kitchen windows of other subscribers. Awwwwwh. Some were just breathtaking! Now we all know that good things come to those who wait, and I am blessed to now be happily installed in "the country" with our own nice view out the kitchen window. It may not be a mountain range or a lake, but we enjoy a little more "breathing room" here than we've had in the past.
Anyways, I know I told you in my last post that I would spare you the candid shots of my addiction, but I decided if sharing my story here on my blog would help just one other person with recognizing their own state of denial, then so be it. My mission is to help free other homemakers from this life gripping addiction. Well, I'll close for now. I'll let you know when Op*rah or Dr*Phil calls for an interview. Have a great weekend and until next time... Blessings, Diane.